27 Comments
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Malcolm Embers's avatar

Dude got his dick ripped off while on acid

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Hopefully he learned something in the process.

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Malcolm Embers's avatar

Honestly read as a genuine moment of self-actualization

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Nick Winney's avatar

cocks are pretty hard to rip off by hand, but the story was joyfully well written and agonising for the poor boy all the way through.

opening lines 🧨🧨🧨🧨

i know i shouldnt really be smiling.

dialogue = perfection although i am struggling a bit about nail clippers and goldfish..

and that pie and pickles was very distracting indeed.

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Emil Ottoman's avatar

This fucking killed me bro. Oh my god. Why can't we ever get any REAL absurdity up in here. HERE is the absurd.

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Yes! I wanted to take a dive in it. Small scale first.

Thinking of something more novel(la) length.

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Takim Williams's avatar

I'd read. Super immersive. Super hot

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Thanks, Takim!

Glad you enjoyed it.

I have other pieces that I think you’d like if you’re into immersive storytelling.

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Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Damn well that was different! Good stuff, homie!

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Thanks, Sean!

Had to take a literary Florida trip to forget the Chicago extended winter for a minute

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S M Garratt's avatar

So... was the whole losing his dick thing part of the trip or for real? If it was for real... the ptsd/cum down would have been a total nightmare... can't stop thinking about "worst trip/ best trip" as a fun collection of absurd tales.

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Unfortunately for our newfound cuck, it was real haha

Thanks for giving it a read and sharing the absurd! Appreciate it

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William Pauley III's avatar

Best opening line ever! Wild story! 👏 👏 👏

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Pablo Báez's avatar

I tried making it better but that line stayed. That’s literally the first sentence I wrote for the story and remained unchanged. Everything else went through a little modification.

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William Pauley III's avatar

Can’t top perfection. 👌

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Tara Deacon's avatar

Dicks seem to be a theme for me right now 😆 I just wrote an article on dick pics LOL ...

This was the weirdest most interesting

couldn't stop reading ...

Had me crossing my legs even though I don't have a dick to cut or pull off stories that I have ever read!!

I truly feel like I have come to the Alice In wonderland adult on acid part of substack!!

It's really amazing!! Your writing is excellent!! As uncomfortable as I may have been at times I definitely couldn't stop reading!! From start to finish this was captivating stuff!!

You are unique one of a kind excellent writer!! There isn't anyone else like you and that's awesome!! I will be back to read more!!

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Thanks for reading and commenting !

I’m glad it made you feel something and you enjoyed it.

Hope you stick around!

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Tara Deacon's avatar

Your welcome!! Im also loyal friend!! 🤣😂🤣

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emma girl's avatar

This was epic

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Pablo Báez's avatar

I’m truly glad and honored it’s Emma approved.

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crwdryn's avatar

Who knew Camus would predict a dick ripping story? In another life, perhaps.

Fuckin' weird in all the right ways!

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ARC's avatar

A brutally funny and emotionally jarring story that turns emasculation into existential performance art. Breck’s voice is unforgettable, and Emma is a force of nature. Seductive, destructive, surreal. Their dynamic haunts like a dream you are ashamed to admit you enjoyed.

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MP's avatar

You NEVER miss. I’m dying laughing and also suffering severe ghost pains. I can’t wait for you to write a novel.

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Pablo Báez's avatar

This means a lot!!!

I appreciate you and your kind words.

I hope you get better soon, and that the laughs help in making the day go easier for you.

Thanks for your words of encouragement!

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MP's avatar

Thank you sm Pablo :’) this definitely helped

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Ricardo José Romeu's avatar

First off, excellent story. The voice is fantastic -- fitting the story like a glove -- and the execution is superb.

"Camus meets Derrida" -- I kept thinking about this as I read through the piece. Raul mentions the absurdity of life a couple times (which makes me put him in the "Camus" box), while the narrator Breck struggles with conflicting feelings throughout the piece (which I'd say puts him in the Derrida box, since Derrida was all about the arbitrariness of binaries and the need to intentionally confuse and disrupt them in order to have them go away and, in his view, liberate people from the "oppression brought on by binaries").

And Camus literally cucks Derrida in this story, in a way meant to highlight the absurdity, in the real world, of Derrida's thinking (this is my interpretation). I.e., the plot details mirror one of the competing ideas in the piece through their mutually absurdism.

I did laugh a lot in the beginning, but as the story went on I felt progressively sadder and sadder for the narrator, boxing himself in too deep within his own contradictory feelings. A few examples:

- Emma's different reactions between Raul pontificating on philosophical matters, and Breck doing something similar in his screed against academia (one I would agree with, by the way). Emma calls Breck "adorable" and prods him to eat a croquette -- almost to say to him, know your place. And he accepts his place like the little lap dog he's convinced himself he is.

- The entire sequence of Emma's vibrator. And the fact that Breck literally has the control to it on his phone. And multiple times here he tries to use it as a method of control or as a reminder to Emma of his worth and their relationship, but it fails. Miserably. In fact, I'd argue that the vibrator only worked to worsen Breck's situation: he may have inadvertently conditioned Emma to associate those sexual feelings with Raul (think of all her holding Raul's arm), and so in Breck's ineffectual, pathetic attempt to divert her away from Raul, he actually accelerated his own cuckholding.

Here are a couple of my favorite moments in the story:

- "But something in the way she crashed out resonated with me." This made me laugh out loud because I can relate pretty hard.

- "This wasn't a performance meant to entertain me, to pleasure me, or Raul." This made me think of Emma as a kind of philosophical battleground between the two men, and the only ones who seem to win are largely Emma herself in the pleasure and Raul. To me, another highlighting of the absurdity of the “argument” between the two men, which seems to make Camus’ point.

- And this paragraph summed up the major conflict for me and was very eye-opening: "Rude. Seemed that everytime Emma talked to me, Raul would thrust harder; Emma's hands on my Goldfish gripping for life; everything felt hot below the waist; Raul kept pounding away with the force of a comet impacting earth again and again and again and again and it wouldn't stop." This was so sad and revealing, a perfect encapsulation of the narrator's central contradiction -- the Derridean breaking of the binaries in the form of being fully present (and on acid) during his own cuckholding, while convincing himself that it was arousing despite his physiological symptoms (hot below the waist) and even his narrative sentence structure (“again and again…”) pointing to the exact opposite—that it bothers him tremendously but he feels he must accept his situation as the “inadequate” goldfish that he thinks he is.

Very thought-provoking piece. One of the best I've seen so far on Substack. Keep going

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Pablo Báez's avatar

Those were the key sequences, and Camus cucking Derrida is what made me feel a bit inadequate (like Brek) cos I didn't think I could pull such a task once I inserted the whole 'discourse' between the two. So in a way I guess I inadvertently projected that, while still coming through (the fucking irony). You know my feels towards the academia side and well, know where I'm coming from with that as well, so this was also my way of responding and 'venting' about it in a jovial manner.

I highly appreciate you reading and leaving such an insightful comment, you displayed this better than I could've articulated it (which is why I made a fiction cuckold story instead of an insightful essay or w/e).

Thanks for that 👊

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