“the thing about grief is that it never truly leaves. from the moment it enters you, it becomes something you are always getting over.”—Hanif Abdurraqib
There always seems to be a new way of writing hiding in the shrubstack. I could never write this way, like @clare frances says but at the same time the unique brain to pen interface has to stay unique or the wonder would be lost wouldn't it.
read this 3 times and thought was this a collab? where are the seams? so deliberately disparate. throwaway depths. a nonchalence of exquisite personal experience.
Its a joy to be let into the lives and feelings and thoughts of others. grounding. safe making. is it a life? isn't it? is it a story. can we be in it.
It is a joy Nick, and a privilege in a way to be let in to someone’s personal movie, to be a spectator of another play while pausing momentarily one’s own—magik.
Was there a particular POV that you liked over the other? A vignette that felt to connect more?
the “what shall we watch and what are we eating” part is very familiar to my life .
the segment with Rham i struggled to follow where it fit.
the poem was really lovely. interesting how the gaps with nothing in them…the spaces and shapes made by emptiness actually add something. it shouldnt be possible but it is!
i am growing to be a big fan.of your fluid styling and experiments. and sense of humour 😎
This was quaint and comforting, while simultaneously sweeping and saga-like. That’s a really challenging paradox to portray. I also loved the tension between his adoration and her grief, the surprise at finding out what she’s thinking after being in his POV. You have a really fascinating style.
I don't know how didn't I get a notification for this comment!
I appreciate you taking your time to read. Glad you enjoyed it and even more so that the style did it justice. I didn't want to compromise either, and although I don't know if we're ever really "happy" with how a piece comes out (I always think I can change something to make it "better" more "real") and in this case I feel good with the end result.
It was a bit hard to approach it from a detached stance, but that's more of a reason to get it out.
It was my pleasure! For what it’s worth, I think you did a great job. And I agree, the harder it feels to tell a story a certain way, the more rewarding it often is to do so.
Reading this was like listening to a slow jam in a thunderstorm—grief with groove, heartbreak with heat. Felt like watching love ghost itself, but i understood with despair. Whatever, make it poetic and Black as hell.
wow,that last shift from soda water to that letter was brutal & perfect. It feel like the floor dropped out from underneath but nobody screamed. You’ve got a real eye for how memory loops back in when the body’s just trying to function. nice one!
I’ve been obsessed lately with memory and how to present it without it being flat or gimmicky. I like that floor drop simile. I did go for a stripped down take of Vicente Huidobro’s Altazor, but less lyrical and more sharp.
I appreciate you taking your time to read and leave a comment!
Never studied it, and don't play an instrument, but I've been tied to music since an early age. My Godfather sang in a salsa orchestra, one of my uncle's was a radio host and hosted large music events and concerts, another uncle is a drummer, I used to write for our band, I also rap (I posted two Raw EP's a couple of weeks ago you can check out).
So I guess it's a hard no in the traditional sense.
In otherwords yes but not in the bougie academic professional sense.
You and Arc and I have this ineffable quality to our prose that I still can't fully explain because all our writing is very different but we put out pieces like this that have this ability to be lyrical without being poetry? if that makes sense? it flows longer with more intentionality. Poetry feels more staccato. I dunno. I need to read and think about it more and find more writers with the same attribute.
I know what you mean. Specially because it's not forced. In terms of rhythm, flow, and everything I pretty much speak as I write (obviously one chooses words more carefully , but you know what I mean).
Probably also cultural. Puerto Ricans are also allegedly known to speak as if they were singing. It's a thing we (I) get a lot from other latinos.
If one grew up listening to tales also influences, I believe. Since old tales had this enchanting quality to them, almost like lullabies. A lot of that is mostly cadence (imo).
One of my last students was a very proud Puerto Rican, he absolutely had a musical quality to his voice. Spanish is such a well built language that way.
I'm afraid I can only read this once because the grief is overwhelming me. Pablo this is beautifully written and those staggered and dropped lines - ugh chef's kiss!
Yeah I felt this one. If I’m correct I think you played around with all three POVs? Fucking amazing shit. The break near the halfway point, a river of letters you use to showcase pieces. Teared up to this one but it leaves you just on the brink. You words echo the grief and pain and I connect to this one very deeply. Lovely work here and I’m glad it’s getting its damn flowers. Nailed this shit.
This makes me want to be a different kind of writer. I love it.
Love to read that, Clare.
If you don't mind me asking, what was it that stuck out to you?
Thank you for time and giving it a read!
Hmm how do I put this…I couldn’t tell who I was, I was each character
Love how you were able to empathize with both.
That makes me happy.
Again, thanks!
I love the combination of writing styles, the creativity, and the potential for personal interpretation
There always seems to be a new way of writing hiding in the shrubstack. I could never write this way, like @clare frances says but at the same time the unique brain to pen interface has to stay unique or the wonder would be lost wouldn't it.
read this 3 times and thought was this a collab? where are the seams? so deliberately disparate. throwaway depths. a nonchalence of exquisite personal experience.
Its a joy to be let into the lives and feelings and thoughts of others. grounding. safe making. is it a life? isn't it? is it a story. can we be in it.
It is a joy Nick, and a privilege in a way to be let in to someone’s personal movie, to be a spectator of another play while pausing momentarily one’s own—magik.
Was there a particular POV that you liked over the other? A vignette that felt to connect more?
the “what shall we watch and what are we eating” part is very familiar to my life .
the segment with Rham i struggled to follow where it fit.
the poem was really lovely. interesting how the gaps with nothing in them…the spaces and shapes made by emptiness actually add something. it shouldnt be possible but it is!
i am growing to be a big fan.of your fluid styling and experiments. and sense of humour 😎
power and strength to your pen Pablo
This was quaint and comforting, while simultaneously sweeping and saga-like. That’s a really challenging paradox to portray. I also loved the tension between his adoration and her grief, the surprise at finding out what she’s thinking after being in his POV. You have a really fascinating style.
I don't know how didn't I get a notification for this comment!
I appreciate you taking your time to read. Glad you enjoyed it and even more so that the style did it justice. I didn't want to compromise either, and although I don't know if we're ever really "happy" with how a piece comes out (I always think I can change something to make it "better" more "real") and in this case I feel good with the end result.
It was a bit hard to approach it from a detached stance, but that's more of a reason to get it out.
Thank you for your words.
Hope to see you around for more!
It was my pleasure! For what it’s worth, I think you did a great job. And I agree, the harder it feels to tell a story a certain way, the more rewarding it often is to do so.
Reading this was like listening to a slow jam in a thunderstorm—grief with groove, heartbreak with heat. Felt like watching love ghost itself, but i understood with despair. Whatever, make it poetic and Black as hell.
Thank you, big man!
It is as you say.
It’s watching a clown juggle Molotov cocktails of grief, love, despair—all to the sound of the carnival music.
Thanks for commenting!
im all the weigh here 4 it
wow,that last shift from soda water to that letter was brutal & perfect. It feel like the floor dropped out from underneath but nobody screamed. You’ve got a real eye for how memory loops back in when the body’s just trying to function. nice one!
I’ve been obsessed lately with memory and how to present it without it being flat or gimmicky. I like that floor drop simile. I did go for a stripped down take of Vicente Huidobro’s Altazor, but less lyrical and more sharp.
I appreciate you taking your time to read and leave a comment!
I’ll be reaching out to you soon.
HOLD UP
I gotta question do you have a background in music
Never studied it, and don't play an instrument, but I've been tied to music since an early age. My Godfather sang in a salsa orchestra, one of my uncle's was a radio host and hosted large music events and concerts, another uncle is a drummer, I used to write for our band, I also rap (I posted two Raw EP's a couple of weeks ago you can check out).
So I guess it's a hard no in the traditional sense.
Why?
In otherwords yes but not in the bougie academic professional sense.
You and Arc and I have this ineffable quality to our prose that I still can't fully explain because all our writing is very different but we put out pieces like this that have this ability to be lyrical without being poetry? if that makes sense? it flows longer with more intentionality. Poetry feels more staccato. I dunno. I need to read and think about it more and find more writers with the same attribute.
I know what you mean. Specially because it's not forced. In terms of rhythm, flow, and everything I pretty much speak as I write (obviously one chooses words more carefully , but you know what I mean).
Probably also cultural. Puerto Ricans are also allegedly known to speak as if they were singing. It's a thing we (I) get a lot from other latinos.
If one grew up listening to tales also influences, I believe. Since old tales had this enchanting quality to them, almost like lullabies. A lot of that is mostly cadence (imo).
One of my last students was a very proud Puerto Rican, he absolutely had a musical quality to his voice. Spanish is such a well built language that way.
I've also been writing songs since I was 13
the slow drift from casual intimacy into deep, shattering loss was so natural it felt inevitable.
I'm afraid I can only read this once because the grief is overwhelming me. Pablo this is beautifully written and those staggered and dropped lines - ugh chef's kiss!
Thank you for sharing🫂💙✨
Thanks for giving it a read!
I really recommend reading it on a computer, tho.
The staggered lines are arranged differently. Although on the phone it’s trippy af as well.
I appreciate you giving me your time and sharing!
I did. I read it in the app and in my email on the desktop.
Yeah I felt this one. If I’m correct I think you played around with all three POVs? Fucking amazing shit. The break near the halfway point, a river of letters you use to showcase pieces. Teared up to this one but it leaves you just on the brink. You words echo the grief and pain and I connect to this one very deeply. Lovely work here and I’m glad it’s getting its damn flowers. Nailed this shit.
when we get into mandy’s pov, it feels like a punch in the gut. it really portrays how we all live in our own reality. i loved this!
If only we could see everything from a third person perspective…
To be a bird in the sky of any one moment…
Thanks for reading and commenting!
Glad it resonated with you
I loved this one.
Thank you!